Monday, April 25, 2011

Musings in a quarter-life crisis

I’m having one of those days.
You know those days when everything is held together but it all seems to be falling apart? Or when you feel like you’re standing still and life is just flying past you?

I don’t like these days, but I guess they are necessary.
Because without them, I’d probably be nowhere.
These days give me a sense of urgency.

Time is running out.

Stop standing.
Move.
Go anywhere.
But just move.

Sometimes I can’t believe that twenty years of my life have gone by. What have I done? How have I made any difference in the world? In someone’s life?
Why is it that when I look back, everything just seems like a big blur of the same routine?

Routine.

I hate routines.

I promised myself I would never fall into a routine.

Life feels like we’re all standing on conveyer belts. For some time, I move at the same pace as others. We develop a great relationship – one of those we’re-on-the-same-page type of friendships. They never seem to last though. Or they do, but the conveyer belts are different. The paces change, and we drift. Drift into new relationships. And throughout life we just keep drifting.
For some reason, lately it feels like everyone is moving faster. Faster. Passing by. Leaving.

I don’t want to be left on my own.

Alone.

Lonely is a terrible feeling.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Ramblings about Love.

love |ləv|
noun, verb

Love is one of those concepts that really have no meaning.
And it’s probably because it’s one of the most overused words in the English language.
I’m sure it had meaning once upon a time, but nowadays it’s like, “I love my cat.” “I love your dress.” “I love this burger.” “I love you.”
How can one word represent so many degrees of affection?
Is love on some sort of spectrum?
What is love?

Over the years, I’ve had many conversations with friends and family about love. Some believe in love at first sight. Others think love is something that grows over time. Some say love is friendship. Others say it is like no other relationship. Some believe you can only fall in love once. Others think that there can be many loves in life.
However different their opinions may be though, they all agree on one thing:
Love is strange, messy, stressful, and makes you act completely insane. And despite this all, it is still completely worth it.

But the question still remains, what is love?
Is love butterflies in your stomach? Is love when all the love songs start to mean something? Is love when you find yourself smiling all the time, for absolutely no reason? Or is love more than all this? Is this just falling in love, and not love itself?

Seriously, what is love?
I guess we should stop trying to define love.
People say you’ll never know what love is until one day you find yourself fallen deep in it.
I hope that’s true for all of us.

Wishing you all lots of love in life.  :)